If it's cold out and you don't like it
Take another shot for a liquid blanket

Or maybe it's wet out and you're not a rain kind of fellow
Then finish your beer. You'll need a liquid umbrella

You're really drunk but you've got to travel far
Turn that feeling into a liquid car

Or you're outside and the snow is falling on your head
Thank goodness you've got that liquid sled

If you're almost passing out you won't hit the cement and say, "ouch"
'Cause you can lay yourself down on that liquid couch

So you're not that strong but you want a tough guy badge
Take a little sip of that liquid courage